It is not an easy task because they want you to feel tramped down. They have so pushed you down. What happens is that you start off feeling confident and then this narcissist will come along, and they know how to get to you. They know how to get under your skin. They know how to trigger you. Eventually you may gain your strength and get out of the relationship and take the narcissist by surprise. The narcissist may underestimate who you are able to become and underestimate who you are.
A lot of times they do believe that they have such a hold over you because they have taken such time to condition you. They do believe that you are never going to leave. They do believe that you are never going to fight back. At many times, that will become the best strategy that you have. The thing to do is to do that thing that is going to shock them. It may be to file to get divorced. It may be to file that lawsuit or to get out of that business relationship. It may be to talk to that person who is going to end up being a witness for you. Do whatever it is that will end up shocking them, so you end up taking control of the situation, you do not let them walk all over you, and they are now shocked that you did not back down or give up.
They really will not believe that you did that and that will be when they really start to respect you. That is when they may have a tantrum. They may say all sorts of horrible things to you. It’s going to trigger them because they are going to be like a two-year-old having a tantrum on the floor. Two-year-olds think that they need to cry louder. They think they need to cry longer because they think that by doing that, they are going to condition you back into doing what they want because that is what has worked in the past. In the past, they have been able to act worse to get you to do what they wanted you to do. They think that guilting you or future faking you or whatever it was that worked in the past on you will be able to move you or manipulate you into doing what it was or getting you to go back.
The more you stand your ground, they will start to fear you because they can not manipulate you or control you anymore. They will eventually realize that they can’t win, and they will eventually back down. They are underestimating your strength and your resilience. They are underestimating your intelligence and your ability to outsmart them. They are underestimating your determination and your will to fight back. They’re underestimating the power of the truth and they are underestimating your ability to go back and find their lies and use them against them because that is what you are going to do when you decide to use that as leverage and as part of your strategy, which is all part of the SLAY methodology, by the way.
So, that is what happens when a narcissist underestimates you. You become the more powerful one. You become the one that they fear and that is a beautiful thing. They’re just going to move on down the road and find a different source of supply because when you are somebody to be feared, you are not a good source of supply anymore. They do not want that. That’s not a good source of supply. Supply is somebody that they can control. That’s winning.
Start winning today by attending a Live FREE Webinar with Rebecca Zung (slayyournegotiation.com) or by watching a recent recording and begin learning the SLAY methodology.