In order to deliver an honest apology, one must have a certain amount of self-awareness and empathy. In addition, one must feel secure enough with themselves to look within and become aware of one’s wrongdoings and shortcomings. These are traits that Narcissists simply do not have. 

Because of their lack of self-esteem and personal value, Narcissists must trick themselves into thinking that they are perfect. If they are exposed as anything but perfect, their fragile sense of self will crack. So, you typically won’t see a Narcissist apologize.

But if they do, you must be clear on the fact that they don’t mean it and never will. Although capable of physically delivering an apology, Narcissists are incapable of backing those apologies with honest meaning. And so, most narcissists do not apologize at all and if they do, it is simply for selfish reasons. 

The “Honest” Apology

If a Narcissist does apologize, it is solely for self-seeking reasons and almost always used as a method of manipulation. 

If you receive what seems like an honest apology from a narcissist, they are most likely portraying guilt and a willingness to change solely for the purpose of appeasing you. More often than not, they are apologizing because they want to get you back under their purview of control. They will say what they need to say to continue getting narcissistic supply from you. Remember the love bombing stage? They are great at telling you what you want to hear but not so great at actually meaning it. 

A narcissist might apologize to ensure their upward trajectory at work, because it is the socially acceptable thing to do, or because they want to get you back after the discard phase. All of these reasons have one thing in common: they are used in order to maintain the Narcissistic supply that they need for emotional survival. 

The Faux-Pology

The faux-pology is one of the Narcissist’s favorite methods of manipulation. When a narcissist uses the faux-pology, you’ll know it. It will probably create an incredible sense of frustration for you as they never feel like real apologies. The faux-pology usually sounds something like this:

I’m sorry you feel that way” or “I’m sorry you took it that way.” This faux-pology isn’t an apology at all. Some narcissists might not even try to hide it’s fake pretense and will say something as obviously devaluing as “I understand that you wanted an apology, so I’m sorry.” It’s best to ignore this and move on. Do not believe that this apology is real nor react in a way that might escalate the situation- giving them the supply that they are looking for. 

The Victim Apology

Narcissists might apologize in order to manipulate the recipient into feeling sorry for them. 

“I’m sorry. I guess I’m just a horrible person. Everything about me is awful.” Although you might actually feel bad for them, it is important to know that this is not a true apology. Playing the victim is their way of deflecting the situation at hand all while devaluing you. This “apology” is used to manage your relationship in addition to their appearance. Although it’s easier said than done, it’s important to not allow yourself to get tricked by this method of manipulation! 

Promising Change

Narcissists will often promise you change. They will do this when they feel insecure in their relationship with you and are afraid that you will leave, or have already left. They will use this last effort in order to get more supply from you. You have probably never seen a narcissist change their behaviors in the past, so why believe them now? If you do believe them, you will again be disappointed by the reality that Narcissists do not change. 

More From Rebecca's Blog
5 Narcissism Code Words You Need to Know

5 Narcissism Code Words You Need to Know

Are you suspecting that your loved one might be a narcissist? If so, understanding the lingo used by those with narcissistic personality disorder is vital to identifying their unhealthy behavior patterns. Knowing which code words are shorthand for what they really...

read more
5 Ways Narcissists Make You Feel Bad About Yourself

5 Ways Narcissists Make You Feel Bad About Yourself

Narcissists love to make you feel bad about yourself, especially when you go into the discard phase. I'm going to walk you through the five main ways that a narcissist makes you feel bad about yourself. You're going to know exactly what they are, so you won't be able...

read more
All Narcissists End Up Losing

All Narcissists End Up Losing

In today's article, we're delving into the intriguing question of whether narcissists, in the end, find themselves on the losing side. You may have your doubts, but trust me, they do lose, and in this post, we'll explore why. Narcissists may appear as winners, and it...

read more
What Narcissists Hear When You Talk

What Narcissists Hear When You Talk

Have you ever wondered what narcissists hear when you talk to them? It's like something comes out of your mouth, goes through this filter, and by the time it reaches their ears, it's like you said something completely different from what you intended. Well, I've been...

read more
Previous
Next
Facebook
Twitter
YouTube
Instagram
{%- if settings.favicon != blank -%} {%- endif -%} {%- unless settings.type_header_font.system? and settings.type_body_font.system? -%} {%- endunless -%} {{ page_title }} {%- if current_tags %} – tagged "{{ current_tags | join: ', ' }}"{% endif -%} {%- if current_page != 1 %} – Page {{ current_page }}{% endif -%} {%- unless page_title contains shop.name %} – {{ shop.name }}{% endunless -%} {% if page_description %} {% endif %} {% render 'meta-tags' %} {{ content_for_header }} {%- liquid assign body_font_bold = settings.type_body_font | font_modify: 'weight', 'bold' assign body_font_italic = settings.type_body_font | font_modify: 'style', 'italic' assign body_font_bold_italic = body_font_bold | font_modify: 'style', 'italic' %} {% style %} {{ settings.type_body_font | font_face: font_display: 'swap' }} {{ body_font_bold | font_face: font_display: 'swap' }} {{ body_font_italic | font_face: font_display: 'swap' }} {{ body_font_bold_italic | font_face: font_display: 'swap' }} {{ settings.type_header_font | font_face: font_display: 'swap' }} :root { --font-body-family: {{ settings.type_body_font.family }}, {{ settings.type_body_font.fallback_families }}; --font-body-style: {{ settings.type_body_font.style }}; --font-body-weight: {{ settings.type_body_font.weight }}; --font-body-weight-bold: {{ settings.type_body_font.weight | plus: 300 | at_most: 1000 }}; --font-heading-family: {{ settings.type_header_font.family }}, {{ settings.type_header_font.fallback_families }}; --font-heading-style: {{ settings.type_header_font.style }}; --font-heading-weight: {{ settings.type_header_font.weight }}; --font-body-scale: {{ settings.body_scale | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --font-heading-scale: {{ settings.heading_scale | times: 1.0 | divided_by: settings.body_scale }}; --color-base-text: {{ settings.colors_text.red }}, {{ settings.colors_text.green }}, {{ settings.colors_text.blue }}; --color-shadow: {{ settings.colors_text.red }}, {{ settings.colors_text.green }}, {{ settings.colors_text.blue }}; --color-base-background-1: {{ settings.colors_background_1.red }}, {{ settings.colors_background_1.green }}, {{ settings.colors_background_1.blue }}; --color-base-background-2: {{ settings.colors_background_2.red }}, {{ settings.colors_background_2.green }}, {{ settings.colors_background_2.blue }}; --color-base-solid-button-labels: {{ settings.colors_solid_button_labels.red }}, {{ settings.colors_solid_button_labels.green }}, {{ settings.colors_solid_button_labels.blue }}; --color-base-outline-button-labels: {{ settings.colors_outline_button_labels.red }}, {{ settings.colors_outline_button_labels.green }}, {{ settings.colors_outline_button_labels.blue }}; --color-base-accent-1: {{ settings.colors_accent_1.red }}, {{ settings.colors_accent_1.green }}, {{ settings.colors_accent_1.blue }}; --color-base-accent-2: {{ settings.colors_accent_2.red }}, {{ settings.colors_accent_2.green }}, {{ settings.colors_accent_2.blue }}; --payment-terms-background-color: {{ settings.colors_background_1 }}; --gradient-base-background-1: {% if settings.gradient_background_1 != blank %}{{ settings.gradient_background_1 }}{% else %}{{ settings.colors_background_1 }}{% endif %}; --gradient-base-background-2: {% if settings.gradient_background_2 != blank %}{{ settings.gradient_background_2 }}{% else %}{{ settings.colors_background_2 }}{% endif %}; --gradient-base-accent-1: {% if settings.gradient_accent_1 != blank %}{{ settings.gradient_accent_1 }}{% else %}{{ settings.colors_accent_1 }}{% endif %}; --gradient-base-accent-2: {% if settings.gradient_accent_2 != blank %}{{ settings.gradient_accent_2 }}{% else %}{{ settings.colors_accent_2 }}{% endif %}; --media-padding: {{ settings.media_padding }}px; --media-border-opacity: {{ settings.media_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --media-border-width: {{ settings.media_border_thickness }}px; --media-radius: {{ settings.media_radius }}px; --media-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.media_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --media-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.media_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --media-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.media_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --media-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.media_shadow_blur }}px; --media-shadow-visible: {% if settings.media_shadow_opacity > 0 %}1{% else %}0{% endif %}; --page-width: {{ settings.page_width | divided_by: 10 }}rem; --page-width-margin: {% if settings.page_width == '1600' %}2{% else %}0{% endif %}rem; --product-card-image-padding: {{ settings.card_image_padding | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --product-card-corner-radius: {{ settings.card_corner_radius | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --product-card-text-alignment: {{ settings.card_text_alignment }}; --product-card-border-width: {{ settings.card_border_thickness | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --product-card-border-opacity: {{ settings.card_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --product-card-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.card_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --product-card-shadow-visible: {% if settings.card_shadow_opacity > 0 %}1{% else %}0{% endif %}; --product-card-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.card_shadow_horizontal_offset | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --product-card-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.card_shadow_vertical_offset | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --product-card-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.card_shadow_blur | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --collection-card-image-padding: {{ settings.collection_card_image_padding | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --collection-card-corner-radius: {{ settings.collection_card_corner_radius | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --collection-card-text-alignment: {{ settings.collection_card_text_alignment }}; --collection-card-border-width: {{ settings.collection_card_border_thickness | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --collection-card-border-opacity: {{ settings.collection_card_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --collection-card-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.collection_card_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --collection-card-shadow-visible: {% if settings.collection_card_shadow_opacity > 0 %}1{% else %}0{% endif %}; --collection-card-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.collection_card_shadow_horizontal_offset | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --collection-card-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.collection_card_shadow_vertical_offset | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --collection-card-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.collection_card_shadow_blur | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --blog-card-image-padding: {{ settings.blog_card_image_padding | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --blog-card-corner-radius: {{ settings.blog_card_corner_radius | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --blog-card-text-alignment: {{ settings.blog_card_text_alignment }}; --blog-card-border-width: {{ settings.blog_card_border_thickness | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --blog-card-border-opacity: {{ settings.blog_card_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --blog-card-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.blog_card_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --blog-card-shadow-visible: {% if settings.blog_card_shadow_opacity > 0 %}1{% else %}0{% endif %}; --blog-card-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.blog_card_shadow_horizontal_offset | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --blog-card-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.blog_card_shadow_vertical_offset | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --blog-card-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.blog_card_shadow_blur | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --badge-corner-radius: {{ settings.badge_corner_radius | divided_by: 10.0 }}rem; --popup-border-width: {{ settings.popup_border_thickness }}px; --popup-border-opacity: {{ settings.popup_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --popup-corner-radius: {{ settings.popup_corner_radius }}px; --popup-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.popup_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --popup-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.popup_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --popup-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.popup_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --popup-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.popup_shadow_blur }}px; --drawer-border-width: {{ settings.drawer_border_thickness }}px; --drawer-border-opacity: {{ settings.drawer_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --drawer-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.drawer_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --drawer-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.drawer_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --drawer-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.drawer_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --drawer-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.drawer_shadow_blur }}px; --spacing-sections-desktop: {{ settings.spacing_sections }}px; --spacing-sections-mobile: {% if settings.spacing_sections < 24 %}{{ settings.spacing_sections }}{% else %}{{ settings.spacing_sections | times: 0.7 | round | at_least: 20 }}{% endif %}px; --grid-desktop-vertical-spacing: {{ settings.spacing_grid_vertical }}px; --grid-desktop-horizontal-spacing: {{ settings.spacing_grid_horizontal }}px; --grid-mobile-vertical-spacing: {{ settings.spacing_grid_vertical | divided_by: 2 }}px; --grid-mobile-horizontal-spacing: {{ settings.spacing_grid_horizontal | divided_by: 2 }}px; --text-boxes-border-opacity: {{ settings.text_boxes_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --text-boxes-border-width: {{ settings.text_boxes_border_thickness }}px; --text-boxes-radius: {{ settings.text_boxes_radius }}px; --text-boxes-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.text_boxes_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --text-boxes-shadow-visible: {% if settings.text_boxes_shadow_opacity > 0 %}1{% else %}0{% endif %}; --text-boxes-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.text_boxes_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --text-boxes-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.text_boxes_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --text-boxes-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.text_boxes_shadow_blur }}px; --buttons-radius: {{ settings.buttons_radius }}px; --buttons-radius-outset: {% if settings.buttons_radius > 0 %}{{ settings.buttons_radius | plus: settings.buttons_border_thickness }}{% else %}0{% endif %}px; --buttons-border-width: {% if settings.buttons_border_opacity > 0 %}{{ settings.buttons_border_thickness }}{% else %}0{% endif %}px; --buttons-border-opacity: {{ settings.buttons_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --buttons-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.buttons_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --buttons-shadow-visible: {% if settings.buttons_shadow_opacity > 0 %}1{% else %}0{% endif %}; --buttons-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.buttons_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --buttons-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.buttons_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --buttons-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.buttons_shadow_blur }}px; --buttons-border-offset: {% if settings.buttons_radius > 0 or settings.buttons_shadow_opacity > 0 %}0.3{% else %}0{% endif %}px; --inputs-radius: {{ settings.inputs_radius }}px; --inputs-border-width: {{ settings.inputs_border_thickness }}px; --inputs-border-opacity: {{ settings.inputs_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --inputs-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.inputs_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --inputs-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.inputs_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --inputs-margin-offset: {% if settings.inputs_shadow_vertical_offset != 0 and settings.inputs_shadow_opacity > 0 %}{{ settings.inputs_shadow_vertical_offset | abs }}{% else %}0{% endif %}px; --inputs-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.inputs_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --inputs-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.inputs_shadow_blur }}px; --inputs-radius-outset: {% if settings.inputs_radius > 0 %}{{ settings.inputs_radius | plus: settings.inputs_border_thickness }}{% else %}0{% endif %}px; --variant-pills-radius: {{ settings.variant_pills_radius }}px; --variant-pills-border-width: {{ settings.variant_pills_border_thickness }}px; --variant-pills-border-opacity: {{ settings.variant_pills_border_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --variant-pills-shadow-opacity: {{ settings.variant_pills_shadow_opacity | divided_by: 100.0 }}; --variant-pills-shadow-horizontal-offset: {{ settings.variant_pills_shadow_horizontal_offset }}px; --variant-pills-shadow-vertical-offset: {{ settings.variant_pills_shadow_vertical_offset }}px; --variant-pills-shadow-blur-radius: {{ settings.variant_pills_shadow_blur }}px; } *, *::before, *::after { box-sizing: inherit; } html { box-sizing: border-box; font-size: calc(var(--font-body-scale) * 62.5%); height: 100%; } body { display: grid; grid-template-rows: auto auto 1fr auto; grid-template-columns: 100%; min-height: 100%; margin: 0; font-size: 1.5rem; letter-spacing: 0.06rem; line-height: calc(1 + 0.8 / var(--font-body-scale)); font-family: var(--font-body-family); font-style: var(--font-body-style); font-weight: var(--font-body-weight); } @media screen and (min-width: 750px) { body { font-size: 1.6rem; } } {% endstyle %} {{ 'base.css' | asset_url | stylesheet_tag }} {%- unless settings.type_body_font.system? -%} {%- endunless -%} {%- unless settings.type_header_font.system? -%} {%- endunless -%} {%- if settings.predictive_search_enabled -%} {%- endif -%} {{ "accessibility.skip_to_text" | t }} {%- if settings.cart_type == 'drawer' -%} {%- render 'cart-drawer' -%} {%- endif -%} {% sections 'header-group' %}
{{ content_for_layout }}
{% sections 'footer-group' %} {%- if settings.predictive_search_enabled -%} {%- endif -%}