Getting divorced is traumatic. Period. And getting divorced when you have kids at home is heartbreaking.

There are few things that you can do to be sure it goes a little bit more smoothly though.

  1. Before separating, make sure to create a parenting plan.  Even if you consider it a temporary parenting plan. Address the day to day schedule.  Specify times and places for pick up and drop off, as well as who is doing the driving.
  2. Do not, under any circumstances, discuss details of the divorce with the kids. Just assure them that they are still loved, that the reasons for the divorce had nothing to do with them, and that they will still have both parents in their lives no matter what.  Similarly, don’t disparage your soon-to-be-ex to the children.  Remember that they are still half that other person – so by disparaging your spouse, you are actually disparaging them too. if you are angry or have negative feelings toward your ex, get support elsewhere.
  3. Figure out a way to communicate with your ex about the kids in a way that will be productive. If that means using a third party monitored service like Our Family Wizard, then that may be best.

I give lots more information in my private virtual divorce masterclasses!  The Core 4 + Kids series. Skip the hassle.  Save the fees.   You can check them out by visiting my website at I am also giving away my bestselling divorce book, Breaking Free:  A Step-by-Step Divorce Guide to Achieving Emotional, Physical and Spiritual Freedom, right now. Just cover a small shipping and handling fee and relief and solutions will be delivered right to your mailbox.

Thanks for joining me today.  I give tips, tricks and divorce secrets every day. If you enjoyed this, please head on over to my youtube channel and hit subscribe.  Also please check out for ways to be supported in your divorce.

I will see you tomorrow for Family Law Secrets Friday – where I will discuss How to Deal With Your Abusive Spouse.

Until then, remember you’re just one step away from your new life. Together, we’ve got this.

More From Rebecca's Blog
Self Care When Coping with Narcissists

Self Care When Coping with Narcissists

Are you dealing with the effects of narcissistic abuse? By the end of this article, I will give you some ideas to start using today, right now, that you can use to start feeling just a little bit better. Now if you're dealing with a narcissist in your life, whether...

read more
Confronting a Narcissist: Will it help at all?

Confronting a Narcissist: Will it help at all?

Much of the current literature on Narcissism Personality Disorder (NPD) concludes that confronting a narcissist is a waste of time, no matter how skillfully the confrontation is executed. According to this school of thought, confronting a narcissist with diagnosable...

read more