Negotiations during the divorce can be tense, emotional and oftentimes, as a result.  Unproductive.  So for sure one of the things you must be aware of first and foremost is – leverage.

What is leverage?  Leverage is what you’ve got to incentivize the other person to settle the case.

What is the biggest mistake I see with this?

Giving your leverage away too early in the game.

It will look like this.    “I don’t want to fight so I know that I am entitled to half of his retirement but I’m not going to touch that.”   OR “I’m working so I won’t ask for spousal support.”  Something to that effect.

That what happens?

The other person doesn’t cooperate resulting in you having to spend more in fees.   Or the other person doesn’t agree to things you thought he or she was going to agree to.   So then you try to take back what you had agreed to, i.e. not going after things that you would perhaps be entitled to under the law.  And then – even worse- the other person gets enraged because you are now back tracking on your word.

That causes the negotiations to become even less productive, more tense, and more volatile than they would have been had you just started off with – I will see what I am entitled to under the law, consider the entire global settlement package (which includes all of the areas upon which you need to agree) and then decided what you want to give in on at that point.

The bottom line – keep your leverage until the final negotiations.  You might need it.

If you enjoyed this piece today, please remember to head to youtube and subscribe to me – I provide tips, secrets and tricks every day.

And also remember to head to www.breakingfreefromdivorce.com where I provide private virtual divorce masterclasses for navigating divorce and getting the winning settlement you deserve.   For a limited time, I am also providing my bestselling divorce book, Breaking Free:  A Step by Step Divorce Guide to Achieving Emotional, Physical and Spiritual Freedom, for free.   We pay for the book.  You cover shipping.  Relief delivered right to your mailbox.

Tomorrow, Wednesday Divorce Wisdom – please make sure to join me to hear about the Pitfalls of Social Media in Divorce.

Until then, remember – you are just one step away from your new life… together, we’ve got this.

More From Rebecca's Blog
Tuesday Divorce Tactics: Leverage in Divorce

Do This Instead of Calling Out Narcissists

When you're thinking about telling the narcissist that they're a narcissist, please don't do it. Do this instead. I have dealt with narcissists in my life, and a couple of them are very close to me. I know narcissists firsthand. Unfortunately, I've learned the hard...

read more
Tuesday Divorce Tactics: Leverage in Divorce

How do you uncover a covert narcissist?

Coworkers and friends with narcissistic personalities are not always easy to identify as such. Their behavior or opinions may seem a little off, but everyone has their quirks. How can you tell if they truly are a narcissist? Find out below what traits our readers...

read more
Tuesday Divorce Tactics: Leverage in Divorce

Working with a Narcissist? 13 Common Mistakes to Avoid

Mistake 1 - Call a narcissist a narcissist to their face Calling a narcissist a narcissist, no matter how true it may be, won’t help. Additionally, naming someone a narcissist is unprofessional unless you are a mental health practitioner who has been licensed and who...

read more
Tuesday Divorce Tactics: Leverage in Divorce

How to Avoid Hiring a Narcissist

How can you avoid hiring a narcissist if narcissists out-perform non-narcissists at job interviews? According to several studies published in business and psychology journals, narcissists receive more favorable hiring ratings from job interviewers than individuals who...

read more
Previous
Next